Ritual Millings
First of all, Merry Christmas! It doesn't feel much like Christmas here what with it being in the mid-70's every day. I think it was actually colder when we first got here in May. You may notice a underwater theme for our tree: yellow submarines, sea horses, and pineapples...they make good underwater housing I hear. We'll be spending Christmas here in Berlin and I thought I might feel homesick, but it just hasn't happened. It might be that my family is coming to down to see me right after Christmas that makes it so easily bareable. In fact, we'll be going scuba diving for new year's, which is one of the reasons for the tree decoration. That said, this will probably be my last real post before we leave on the 26th. I do plan on posting a neat video slideshow I made for Christine's life skills class before then though.
So every morning I wake up and the first thing I do is sit down at the computer and go to www.thehungersite.com and click on all of the tabs to donate food, books, child healthcare, animal food, several square feet of rainforest, and even mammograms from the money the sites generate off of advertising. I often stop and think about that bowl of food or wonder what book it is that I've managed to donate to some child somewhere. It's a ritual, a habit, but a good one. Where rituals go wrong is when those participating have forgotten why they are doing them.
I've never been a religious person. I find things awe-inspiring and beautiful, and I don't need or want someone to explain it to me. I believe that morals are not something that has to be carved into stone and taught. People know how they feel and also have the ability to empathize and know how they would feel in another person's place. I believe thats all that is required for natural morality.
It seems the reason most people are religious is out of an inherent desire to do good, because simply put, doing good things, making others happy, relieving suffering, those things make us feel good. It's a win/win situation. Religion is just an organized way of doing that, because teamwork allows us to accomplish greater things than could ever be done individually. Of course there are other reasons for being religious, simply the need to be accepted by a group of people, but I like to think that inherent desire is at the root.
A little over a week ago El Salvador and many latin countries celebrated the day of the virgin of Guadalupe. I had assumed that all of these virgins I'd seen were all just THE virgin, but I've been wrong this entire time. The virgin of Guadalupe was a virgin that appeared to a boy on a hill in Mexico, how he knew she was a virgin I can't say. This was around the time the spaniards were raping and pilaging and the virgin gave this boy a message, she said that everyone should accept the europeans and accept Catholicism. The virgin by the way was an indigenous woman, although you wouldn't guess it from her pale statues. Anyway, the message was miraculously spread far and wide and helped the spaniards convert much of latin america.
The 20th of December is not the actual day the virgin appeared, but the day that she stomped the devil back down to hell. The night before everyone lights fires outside and sets of fireworks, which down here are basically small chunks of dynamite and gunpowder. Incidentally, firework production is a booming business for child labor here, who else could fit their tiny little fingers in them to pack down the powder for 40 cents a day. It was pretty enjoyable, although I had to wonder if the virgin would approve of the tire fires in her honor.
The next day people dress up "indigenously" to honor her. Mainly they just dress up the children because I think the adults are too embarassed for the most part. However, another part of it which I find really sad is that I don't think they even understand what indigenous is to them anymore. I'd seen little boys dressed up with white clothes with patches on them before but I'd basically assumed they were dressing up as clowns. The girls put on way way too much make-up and wear bright spanish-style dresses. I know their hearts are in the right places but I feel like it's just another sad reminder of the successful cultural invasion thats taken place.
Anyway, I was tricked into attending a mass at the Catholic church in town. I had been told we were just going to the park for a celebration. While we sat there and I tried to understand what was being said through the horribly distorted loudspeakers I got gradually more and more frustrated. I could tell that everyone was simply repeating the same rituals mindlessly. I thought of the hundreds of people spending their time on these rituals that had lost all meaning. I have no doubt that it's like that around the world. The incredible waste of time and energy that could actually be used to resolve the problems that these people were coming to church for.
So these people mill about day after day, say their prayers, obediently listen and sing along, when all of that time they could be building houses for the poor(themselves) or schools, or teaching each other better ways to farm, or doing any number of things that would take actual steps toward relieving suffering and all of those inherently good things that lie at the root of their religion. I'd have a lot more respect for religion and religious leaders if there was a lot less praying and a lot more action.
I guess the point I'm making is that it's easy just to do things because you've been doing it that way for so long. We have to be vigilant in asking ourselves why we do the things we do. Curiosity and questioning are the things that keep our eyes open and we have to make that the ritual. Amen.
I'm done with preaching, it's time for some sacrifices. This wouldn't be any kind of a post if I made a play on ritual killings and didn't produce, so here's some blood-letting for you. The neighbors slaughter a pig every week or two and Christine asked to kill it, don't ask me why. I used to be somewhat squeamish around stuff like this, but that's almost completely faded now. It's obviousy nowhere in the picture for Christine. In a way I feel stronger now that it's gone, but I also don't know that I like being accustomed to it either. Sorry for the sideways video, it's too big of a pain to turn it.
Christine has also started a new soccer career. A couple of the girls from the ecology youth group asked her to play on their all-girl intramural team and man did she kick butt. It was an all-ages league and apart from her they had youngest team. She only played in the last 3 games and they won 2 of them, but didn't quite make it to the finals. However, she made an impression on some of the other women who invited her to play on the girl's team for the whole city.
From left to right is Dinora, who needs to learn to pass and guard, Fatima, who needs to quit kicking the ball so hard, Raquel their top notch goalie, her baby, Christine, and Clara bella. You may have noticed that at 15 Raquel is somewhat young to have a 2 year old baby. If you knew her step-father you might also notice that the baby bears a striking resemblance. It's one of the tragic and disgusting things about this country. The repressed sexuality leads to a horribly high rate of child molestation and outright rape. The even more horrible part of the story is that the step-father still lives with them and her mother acts like nothing happened. It's shocking to me how far people will go to avoid conflict in this country. Once again, I imagine it stems from the war, but that's no excuse.
Anyway, I'd like to leave you on a less depressing note and since no post is complete without the ambiguously gay duo on their favorite perch, here you are.
One of the forces is the fact that I don't want to depend on this system, economically, politically, or otherwise. That leads me to want to be self-sufficient, which inherently leads me to an escapist reality. The other force wants to take an active role in changing the system so that everyone can depend on it, which necessarily means an offensive route which simply can't be done alone so self-sufficiency just isn't an option.
So my revised plan is this. When I get back to the states, instead of hiking the appalachian trail, I'll apprentice on an organic farm until August when I 'll hopefully start attending grad school in Baltimore for web design. I'll use my thesis project there to make a website, but it will be less of a website and more of a tool for community organization. That is, unless someone does it before me. Either way I'll offer my skills to moveOn and other web projects that work for social change afterwards.
I still haven’t talked to the boy yet, but I’m still going to give him the talk I planned on. I’m going to talk to him about how sometimes we do things, almost by instinct and don’t really know why, but even though it only takes a fraction of a second to do, it can have serious consequences, even for the rest of our lives. Then I’m going to tell him a story of my own, and tell him that I hope he thinks about it and can avoid things like this in the future that could end up being much much worse. Anyway, I feel like a parent trying to teach some life skills, it’s an interesting feeling. We’ll see if I’m any good at it, but I don't plan on needing these skills anytime soon.